“It’s like a shotglass of blood!”
“Annoy me and I’ll throw it at you”
If liquids are the bane of a nomad’s existence, then periods are the ultimate plague of the female nomad’s life
…Well, if you’re like at me, at least.
Every month, you’ve got an orifice that intensely leaks clot ridden blood for 5 days straight, your uterus constantly throbs in pain, you’re left slightly incapacitated and bloated all while you’re aggressively hungry, horny, lethargic, moody and sensitive… at the same time.
To combat this, you’ve got to:
- Act like a decent human being (even though your hormones are telling you to behave like the she-devil or an unsoothable crying infant)
- Not leak and stain your clothes or the furniture around you (and go through embarrassment that will haunt you for years to come)
- Smell good (and not like you’ve got 4 hour old blood collecting in your crotch)
- Load yourself with painkillers and hot tea (because, I swear, our uterus is out to kill us)
I started out using pads that I would change every few hours. It felt disgusting and smelled much worse. Leaks were pretty much a guarantee at night. It’s not uncommon to double down on pads and wear 2 or 3 extra large pads at a time. To be honest, there were days I wanted to wear an adult diaper. Yeah, for some women, periods are more than just an annoying inconvenience, it’s truly a fucking curse.
Then, many years later, I discovered tampons. Tampons were a revelation for me. I didn’t feel nearly as uncomfortable, it didn’t smell as much, and the only annoyance was the frequent change and the string potentially making an appearance. (I always feared it’ll get lost in there, but it never happened, even when I wore one half the size of my pinky, and forgot about it for 24 hours. Don’t ever do that, by the way). I thought tampons were the holy grail of period-blood catchers.
But one day, my husband surprised me by buying me a menstrual cup. And that day, my friends, was that day I realized that I’ve been living like an archaic savage, screaming and raising my hands full of bloody tampons in the air.
Note: This post was written by Asha Jacob, Eddy’s wife.
Disclaimer: This review is not paid for or related to Eva as a company in any way. Everything here is 100% my opinion, and I am under no obligation or expectation whatsoever to give a favourable review. The following is my unfiltered and honest opinion, and nothing else.
What the Eva Menstrual Cup Is Made To Do:
On the homepage for the Eva Up, they claim that its…
- Easy to use
- 12 Hour Leak-Free Protection
- Pays for itself in just a few months
- Healthier than pads and tampons
TL;DR? Skip to The Results section at the bottom.
Note: I happen to own the Eva cup, but this review fits equally well for just about any menstrual cup out there.
Does the Eva Menstrual Cup Do What Its Are Made To Do?
Easy to use
Verdict: True (after learning period… get it? GET IT?!)
When I first looked at the size of the cup, I didn’t think it would fit and I thought it was going to give me a lot of pain. Putting a finger or two up in there already felt like too much (and sex can be very overwhelming!) But turns out, by pressing down the middle and folding the cup, coupled with a little saliva, it was a snug fit. (Do not use lube, you’ll damage the silicone)
The trick is that you need to slide it in (either squatting or standing with one leg on the toilet seat), point it towards your tailbone and move it till you feel the cup open up to its full size inside you (and that it doesn’t remain in the same folded position it entered you in). Many people suggest twisting it so that it will open up. That worked for me, but I figured out a faster way. Once I slid it in, I put a finger in me (between the cup and the wall) and pressed away from the cup so that it had space to pop to its original size on its own. It works every time.
Make sure the cup is fully open and the tip of it remains touchable from the outside. You don’t have to worry about it getting lost. But you do have to worry about it going too deep in. When this happens, you’ll end up leaking.
It takes a while to get the hang of it. But once you do, it’s incredibly easy and takes only a couple of seconds to get it in.
Oh, and the best part is that, no matter how hard you push, it won’t slide out unless you pull it out directly. (Unlike those pesky tampons)
As for removing it, remove it straight down, admire how much blood you produced, and the dump it in the toilet. After, wash it thoroughly in the sink and put it waayyyy up into your vagina, Morty.
12 Hour Leak-Free Protection
Verdict: Very True
In the learning phases of using the cup, I had many leaks, but none compared to tampon or pad leaks. They were much lighter and easier to manage. Once I’ve got the hang of inserting the cup properly, the only times I had leaks were when I wore it for MORE than 12 hours and was sleeping on my side. And that happens because the cup is full.
I’ve accidentally (see: irresponsibly) worn the cup on my 3rd and 4th day for up to 20 hours. No leaks. No discomfort.
Don’t do that, though.
Oh, and did I mention that because the blood doesn’t get any exposure to air… there’s no smell at all. That’s right folks, at all. You do not smell like you are on your period.
This cup is truly one of the good things on this planet.
Pays for itself in just a few months
My cup cost me $30 and I’ve been using it for over a year now. No tampons. No pads. Nothing else. Compared that to $5 worth of tampons every month, equalling up to $60 a year? No thanks.
The key to keeping your cup for long periods (a few years), you’ve got to make sure you clean it right. Read this to see how to clean your cup right.
Healthier than pads and tampons
Verdict: True… I think
These cups are made from medical grade silicone.
Taken from the website itself “When a tampon is inserted, its composition of rayon and cotton absorbs your vagina’s protective fluid, drying out and disrupting its normal pH levels”.
While I’ve not noticed a change in my health down there, it does make sense that cotton would absorb any natural fluid your vagina produces while silicone would not. As long as you clean your cup regularly, you’re good.
I’ve stuffed this in pockets in my bag and travelled to several countries. It has dealt with being dropped on floors and being compressed. The cup looks and feels exactly like when I got it. After a couple of months, I did notice a smell. But after thorough cleaning, it’s back to looking great.
When your cup has a persisting smell that won’t go away or has a sticky or powdery film, dispose of it. It means the silicone has been compromised.
Just wash it. That’s it.
Weight, Size, & Noticeability: 5/5
It weighs practically nothing.It’s smaller than my palm. Mine is green, so that may stand out. But otherwise, I keep it in my bag all the time, and it barely takes up any space.
You can stop buying tampons and pads.
Get it and don’t give up when you’re learning how to fit it in without leaking. I promise you, once you’ve gotten the hang of it, it’s a complete life changer. 12 hours of leak-free protection, all while you don’t feel anything at all.
You can get your Eva cup on Amazon for $25.